One-on-one priestly sessions and holy underpants...

Dear Father Ashley,

I've just read the About the Church section on your website and discovered you are not a real priest! I'm distraught. I have burned all my poker books and have turned to Satan.

Why did thou foresake thee Father Ashley?

Yours faithfully,


Dear Brother Terrance,

Let's get something straight. I am as much a Priest as any other person in any other religion has a right to be addressed so.

The Church of Texas Holdem is unique. It's the only poker religion on the planet! That means we don't answer to anybody and nobody can tell us what to do.

There's no huge Holy guy to smite me if I upset him; no clown in a coloured bathrobe and a big pointy hat to send Holy police around to feel my white collar.

Your choice to burn your poker books is an interesting one. Certainly I would have suggested recycling them at the very least.

Satan is as Satan does. You may find your short-term luck with drawing hands improves. I hope it works out for you.

Meanwhile, if you still require salvation, come back to the Church of Texas Holdem. Who knows, if enough people are upset about it, I might ordain myself one day!

Father Ashley

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